A few years ago, one of the top trending stories was the overt sexism in children’s costumes; little boys were given options to traditionally masculine careers like firemen, police officers, doctors, etc. and little girls were given options such as princesses, witches and pop stars. This was depriving all children of freedom of expression. Kids were not given the same opportunity to play pretend on the one holiday when it is actively encouraged to be what you are not, or what you want to become.
As an intersectional feminist, I am at times a walking hypocrite, as we all can be, in that I unintentionally bolster up certain anti-feminist ideals through my behavior. For example, my actions while browsing the Spirit Halloween costume store last Sunday were unintentionally sabotaging my belief in gender equality.
We all have seen couples costumes around- the cute ones, the funny ones, the nerdy ones, the sexy ones and those that completely miss the mark (but hey, that couple gets it and that’s what’s important).
I am someone who likes dressing up sexy and scary for Halloween, and I feel no shame, only empowerment. Because of this, the sexualized costumes have never bothered me. The problem I hadn’t realized until now was the distinct roles being given to men and women via their costumes. Just like the children’s costumes, we were being assigned gender roles and I was the one helping appropriate it.
Walking through one isle, I poked fun at lots of sports and athletics costumes, especially the coaches and players. The female player’s costume was ridiculous, but what got to me was that if I dressed up as a football coach, I was somehow supposed to manage all the plays/players in the comfort of a cropped polo shirt and spanks. It even had a whistle so it looked professional.
That’s when my boyfriend pointed out the men’s boxer costume. He suggested I be a coach and he be the boxer, but because I am the only one out of the two of us with boxing experience I told him that he should be the referee and I be the boxer (I had the “costume” at home already). Then he shrugged and said, “Why don’t we just both be fighters?”
Suddenly I was aware of the opposites being enforced on couples’ costumes. It always seems to come off as cute “opposites attract,” but what it’s perpetuating is that men and women cannot have the same roles. They cannot have the same job, degree, power or costume and still be a healthy match. One of them must be the weaker or more submissive one, and generally this responsibility falls on the woman.
Just like the children’s gendered costume options, these opposing roles limit both parties involved. So, this year my partner and I are dressing up as boxing opponents, and if anyone asks us to fight I’d say we are equally matched. He’s got the size and weight to his advantage, but I’ve got speed and training on my side. We will not be taking cash bets, as sports betting is illegal in the United States, but if anyone is interested in taking chances with mini-snickers or king-sized KitKats, we will be accepting those.
Rebecca Pratt can be reached at [email protected].