I was reluctant to start watching Game of Thrones.
Between being told I would get addicted, the tales of violence towards women and lots of blood guts, I didn’t really see the appeal. However, I was recently convinced of the appeal, and am now a loyal, excited fan.
As a courtesy, this column does contain spoilers.
The show is graphic and controversial. There is plenty of throat cutting and intestines falling out of bodies that have been chopped open. Some guys’ head even is squeezed until it explodes – not pleasant.
For me, the most unpleasant part is the rape. It’s never any easy thing to depict.
As a woman who has existed in the world, I have feared for my safety. I’ve been followed in the dark, I’ve used made-up phone calls and illness to escape unsafe situations and heard every statistic in the world about young women and rape. So to see it depicted on the screen, while I’m relaxing and trying to be entertained, it’s difficult to watch.
In season five, Sansa Stark is married to Ramsay Bolton – third guy’s the charm, eh? Bolton is no catch though. To say he’s a sadomasochist would be putting it likely.
After watching Bolton be cruel to anyone he chooses, I figured that when him and Stark were married, he would force her to do things she did not want to. Sure enough, after their wedding, Bolton rapes Stark. She’s has had a rough go at life, so to see life land another blow on her is disheartening. It’s also scary to think this very situation was legal in the United States until 1993 – three years before I was born.
It’s not a particularly graphic scene. Throughout the show, there’s plenty of graphic depictions of sex, and even more shots of breasts. Bolton is shown ripping Stark’s dress in the back. Stark is shown with her face on the bed, crying. A servant Bolton makes watch is shown, also crying. Then the episode ends.
I had to wait a day or two to watch the next episode.
I haven’t been sexually assaulted, but having those statistics and likelihoods in my head was enough to be frightening. But I think the way HBO handled the scene was tasteful and accurately depicted the terror and violation of rape.
First, there was no penetration or really any nudity. For a Game of Thrones scene, that’s pretty rare. If you go through a track instances where there was nudity and sex, it’s in scenes where both parties are willingly participating in sex. It’s very clear that everyone consented and are having a grand old time.
When Stark was raped, the only nudity was her upper back. She was crying, and uncomfortable around Bolton in scenes leading up to her rape. In this scene, it was very clear she was not consenting. And that’s what made it so hard to watch – viewers knew she didn’t want this. The rape was shown as a despicable, terrible thing to do to someone – as it should be.
One could argue that a rape shouldn’t be depicted at all, that it’s too graphic and awful of a thing to ever show. However, I think it depends on how it’s portrayed. In this instance, it fits with the setting and time period.
Many fans also argue, because it wasn’t in the books, it was an unnecessary scene. Being that a totally separate character was married to Bolton in the books, it makes sense to consolidate the storylines using Stark. I love books, and will be the first to say the books are better than any television or movie adaption, but it’s important to keep in mind that some things must be changed for the sake of a better viewer experience.
It’s also important to consider, in Game of Thrones, rape was a rather normal part of marriage and being a woman. I think one of the more frustrating parts of the show is comparing how women are treated then to modern day. There are huge differences and it can be difficult to watch. Whenever another girl is married off to a dude like a piece of meat, I cringe inside and have to do some deep breathing.
After the rape, Stark takes charge of her life. While using rape to develop a female character is a common and overused trope, again, for the time period, it’s relevant.
Not mention, the actress that plays Stark, Sophie Turner, has taken steps off screen to ensure progress is made for women who, in modern day, are still largely treated like Stark.
Turner became a United Kingdom Patron for Women for Women International, a non-profit group helping women in war-torn countries develop skills to advance their financial and physical well-being.
She visited Rwanda in March to witness the work the organization does. Many of the women survived the Rwandan genocide in the 1990s.
In a blog post for the Huffington Post, Turner noted the mental and economical scarring in these communities.
“They don’t have the skills or finances to look after kids without their husbands,” she said, according to USA Today. “(The work is) about teaching them savings and how to farm and look after their animals. It’s not just about providing them with mental care. It’s about creating a plan for their future. It’s a really wonderful organization.”
Overall, I think this whole issue speaks to a larger issue – women are often the victims of needless sexual violence during wartimes. Rape is still a hard subject for many people. Any war of any size can be tracked to a rise in rape and violence against women. Context is important. Making a positive out of a negative, is even better.
Tess Fox can be reached at [email protected] or on Twitter @tesstakesphotos