Use tanning beds
The “Final Destination” franchise has come up with some pretty creative and silly ways to kill people with everyday objects. But none of them top the infamous tanning bed scene from the third film. Two hot chicks strip down and try to work on their bikini lines and end up getting baked and not in a fun way. From now on, my tans are getting sprayed on.
Eat chocolate pie
Chocolate pie in itself seems pretty harmless, right? Well, tell that to Bryce Dallas Howard in “The Help,” who learned the hard way that the maids who bake your food are not to be taken lightly.
Walk around barefoot
Say what you will about shoes being uncomfortable, but any fans of “Die Hard” will think twice about sacrificing foot coverings for comfort.
Go anywhere with no cell phone reception
Five words: Every horror movie ever made.
Go hiking
Hiking may be a good work out and a great way to see some scenery, but on the off chance you get pinned to rock wall for “127 Hours,” you could end up amputating your own arm with a Swiss army knife. Just saying.
Take baths
Hygiene is important. You have to get clean somehow. For many, a bath is a great and relaxing way to wash off. And to that, I present to you the scene from “Slither,” where slugs crawled into the tub with a hot girl. Feel free to reserve a shower. I know I did.
Get drunk in Vegas
If you want some excitement in your life, going to Las Vegas is one way. But “The Hangover” proved that not everyone can handle Vegas. But if you ever do end up in a similar situation, remember to check the roof first.
Watch videotapes
Most people can hardly remember a time where films had to be rewound, but “The Ring” instilled a fear of watching such tapes, especially ones that were unmarked. And if the phone rings afterward and a creepy voice tells you that you’ll die in seven days, that’s cause to head for the hills.
Bradley Burgess can be reached at [email protected]
Shane Wellner | Rawr